Have you ever had a friend or family member lose a loved one but just didn't know what to say to comfort them? Have you wanted to help them or do things for them but didn't know what you could do? Have you said to someone "call me if you need anything" but never received that phone call? In the non-fiction, self-help book The Art of Comforting, author Val Walker touches on all of these ideas and gives real advice on how to truly comfort someone.

Take a look at this video of Val Walker giving 5 tips on how we can best support the people we love when they need us the most:



My Take
I do all the wrong things when "trying" to comfort someone. Half the time I'm so nervous about what to say that I never express my sympathy to the person in mourning - and this is obviously not a comfort to them, since they have no idea how I'm feeling! When I do try to tell them how sorry I am, it generally is just words with no action behind them. And I am 100% guilty of saying "call me if you need me" and knowing that they won't call.

In her book, Val Walker emphasizes the correct and best ways to help someone in mourning and how to best comfort them. She interviewed 13 top professionals from various fields and gives their ways of how to comfort others. I love how she first tells you about the person she interviewed and then relates that person's ideas on the most important qualities of a comforting person, how that person comforts in his/her line of work and then the "do's and don'ts" for comforters. The people she interviewed for the book are fascinating, and the advice they each give is easy to understand and implement in our own lives. For example, instead of just saying "call me if you need me", call the person who needs you. Tell them "I'll give you a call on Monday" and then follow through. Give the person an expectation of when you will do something and always make sure you stick to it. Visit the person, offer specific help (making meals, running errands) and don't expect them to call you even if they need help with things. Someone who is in mourning is just not in the mindset to even think about what they need done and surely will not call someone even if they offered to help. This is just one of the many tips and guidelines the book gives on how to comfort others. Comforting is a lost art that needs to be revived, and this book is a great way to learn how!

Cost: You can buy The Art of Comforting for $10.85 from Amazon.com. ($$$)

Overall: We give The Art of Comforting a 10/10!

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We were sent The Art of Comforting from Tarcher/Penguin free of charge for the sole purpose of this review; no other compensation was received. All opinions expressed are my own.

This is a Mama Buzz review. The product was provided by: Tarcher/Penguin for this review.