Losing a child is one of the most devastating things that can happen to a person, and it comes in many forms - miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, etc. Even if you have never experienced a miscarriage or chemical pregnancy yourself, I can guarantee you personally know someone that does. I have heard statistics that 20% of pregnancies end in miscarriage, the vast majority before you would even realize you were pregnant. This is why many women who say they have never had a miscarriage probably have had one that they had no idea about.

In January of 2008 I had my very first IUI and was excited to be staring at my first BFP. I went to the RE with hope and optimism. But that pregnancy was not meant to be. My hCG levels did not double properly and eventually decreased and ended in miscarriage. Although I was pregnant for only a very short period of time, it still hurt. I was terrified I would never become pregnant again, that it was some kind of a fluke that I even got the positive test in the first place. It was a very dark place to be for several months as I kept getting BFN after BFN on all of my other IUIs. I kept telling myself about all the people I knew who had had miscarriages and went on to have healthy children. I kept telling myself that so many people who are dear to me would never have been born if their mothers hadn't had miscarriages before they were conceived. Then, of course, I became pregnant with the twins before my original due date had passed. This meant that had that first pregnancy been successful, I would not have my precious twinners. My sweet, gorgeous Chana with the red curls and my adorable Dovid with his captivating grin. With that pregnancy my hope was renewed, though I was constantly terrified of losing the pregnancy. That fear never goes away, no matter if you're 10 weeks or 38 weeks pregnant or have a newborn. You still fear that something will happen to your precious baby. The twins are now 3 1/2 and Tzipora is 1 1/2. Do you think I don't still check to see that they're breathing while they're sleeping? Of course I do! (Especially since Dovid likes to smother himself under the covers, but that's a different story entirely...) But that is part of being a mom...you always worry about your kids. I'm sure my mom worries about me, too. (Hi, Mom!) So, in honor of International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, give your child a hug. And if you are still on your journey to motherhood (or fatherhood), have experienced miscarriage or loss (or not), I give you a special hug, because I am crying right along with you.


Today, October 15th, is International Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, a day of remembrance for pregnancy loss and infant death which includes miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, or the death of a newborn. The National Institute of Health estimates that of the 4 million births a year in the United States, there are 26,000 stillbirths; meaning one in every 160 births results in a stillborn. These statistics can change significantly with your help!

After learning that Norway had dramatically reduced its still birth rates by conducting a public health campaign on kick counting, five Des Moines-area moms, who each lost babies to late-term stillbirth or infant death, launched a statewide public health campaign in Iowa called Count The Kicks in 2009. The campaign was developed to prevent late-term birth complications and stillbirths and urges parents to contact their health care providers immediately if they notice significant changes in their babies’ movements. Scientific studies indicate kickcounting, a daily record of a baby’s movements (kicks, rolls, punches, jabs) during the third trimester, is an easy, free and reliable way to monitor a baby’s well-being in addition to regular prenatal visits.

To learn more about how you can prevent the loss of more lives, join the Count the Kicks movement and spread kick awareness!

Click here for more information, videos, and a Count the Kicks downloadable poster.